Sleeping In (Unintentionally)

Close to disaster today. I went out on a night dive yesterday and we didn’t end up getting back to the shop until 9 p.m. As I had assisted on the dives, I also had to help clean all the gear and rack it and then help out with paperwork and checking in the computers/compasses as well. By the time we were done it was getting close to 10. After a quick beer with my instructors, I was set to head off. But no, a quick change of plans. The student that we took out for her first three advanced dives needed to do her remaining dives in the morning, as opposed to the originally scheduled afternoon dives.

And to make it more interesting, I was asked if I would lead her on the first dive as a “naturalist” dive (basically, this is an elective dive that a student can do for their advanced open water certification. It is often used as a cop out, particularly when conditions/visibility is bad. Everyone knows the types of coral and fish around here, so if it is too rough, etc. to do one of the other electives [i.e. multi-level diving], the instructors will often sign off students on this elective). With this student, she didn’t want to have to “learn” anything new and just wanted “easy” dives. To accommodate her, it was agreed that the two dives today would be the naturalist dive and peak performance buoyancy, neither of which require any particular pre-dive studying or video-watching.

To make it more fun (and I suspect easier for the instructor), I was advised that I would lead her on a naturalist dive and point out interesting fish, etc. In addition, I was to give her the boat and dive briefs as practice.

Now, here comes the problematic part. As you are undoubtedly aware, sleeping has been a bit of an issue for me since I got here. Out of my entire almost three weeks, I have slept only one night solidly. At most, on a given night, I will enjoy about three hours uninterrupted sleep. Eventually such sleep deprivation catches up. I have been headachy and sort of out-of-it (yes, more than normal) for about five days. So last night, as I was aware that I had to lead the dive and be kind of responsible, I decided I needed a good night’s sleep.

I went to my apartment. Now, before I left for Thailand (and I may have also mentioned this), I went and saw my sports doctor. I got two prescriptions, a muscle relaxant that kicks ass and sub-lingual sleeping tablets. The idea was because I was on a particularly long trip, I wanted to be able to get rid of any significant back pain and sleep on the plane. Turns out that didn’t have any real back pain (first class is a bitch) and in any event the sleeping tablet didn’t seem to kick in when I did take it.

Not so lucky the next time. I took the sleeping tablet, set my two alarms for 6:10 and 6:15 a.m., put in my ear plugs and turned off the lights. And woke up at 7:40 a.m. SHIT!! What the hell happened to my alarm clocks???

Jump out of bed, trip over the PADI books by my bed, kick my shin against an archway, slightly headbutt it as well for measure and bruise the crap out of knee in the process. Grab my cell phone. It says 3 missed calls (funnily enough, none of them were from the missus, but I’ll get back to that in a minute). All 3 calls are from Michael, the instructor I am helping.

I hit recall and lo and behold, the phone makes a pathetic beep and dies. Yep, no juice. Could this get any better? Oh yes, yes it could. I plug the phone in and see if I can make a call…nope.

So, what can I do? The taxi would have left Sunshine at 7:15, meaning I am already 25 minutes behind it. The boat for the morning dive is suppose to leave at 7:45. I turn on the shower and soak my hair and pull it down the sides of my head. Grab a pair of cycling (aka dive) shorts and board shorts, a tee and grab my dive bag. I don’t check to see if I have everything, I don’t have time. It is now 7:43 a.m.

Here’s where it gets better. I also happen to have the fish slates (plastic sheets that can go underwater and show the local fauna and flora), the student’s mask and snorkel, computer and compass and a pair of her socks for making the fins fit better (she must have put them in the mesh bag the day before).

Ordinarily, Ban’s from my place is about a 5 to 10 minute moped ride. I arrive at 7:46. At this point I figure I am screwed and the boat will have left. I just hope I can catch Michael and the student so that they at least have the gear. I am guessing that I won’t be able to lead the dive, but hey, why should the student suffer?

Incredulously, the boat hasn’t left. In fact the first speedboat load of students went out and it is on its way back for the second load, which will include Michael and the student.

Unfortunately for me, Michael didn’t bring my gear because he couldn’t get hold of me. One of the recently qualified DM’s, Regina (a lovely lady from Lippstadt in Germany, which freakily enough, is a place where I lived when I was a kid for a couple of years. Actually, it is also the only place I swear I ever saw a ghost. I was playing hide and seek in the army quarters we lived in and I was hiding behind some tall grass up against a fence. I swear I saw a hare in the grass close by on my side of the fence, but it was see-through!!! I believe that this is also the town where one of my childhood friends and I were flashing passing cars with our penises, but I could be slightly wrong, that might have been a couple of years before…..mum? Oh yeah and I should mention Peter as well, Regina’s boyfriend, they really are a lovely and funny couple. A little like Noe and Celia, another DM couple from Switzerland…hang on, I think I have gotten side-tracked) takes my moped keys and goes and parks my moped while I frantically run around the Ban’s storeroom grabbing student rental gear to go out on the boat with. The boat that leaves in two minutes. Regina comes into the room and gives me my keys and seeing my slightly frazzled and completely dopey state (seriously, I have been awake about ten minutes at this point…and used drugs to get to that state), helps me grab the rest of my gear.

I make it out!! I also give a stellar boat and dive brief and successfully lead the student on a 35 minute naturalist dive. Of course the dive was boring as all shit, because the boat crews refuse to go further than about half a mile at the moment because of somewhat rough seas, but hey, I did my part!! The student, even though she is somewhat disappointed in the boat’s choice of dive site, tells me that I made the dive fun and at least did my best to find some cool sights. Yay me.

Except I completely missed a scheduled phone call with my missus!! L I was supposed to chat at 9 a.m. this morning (which would have been 9 p.m. her time). But I had my plans changed to go out on the boat. Admittedly my phone was also dead, but even if it hadn’t been, I would have been in the water at 9 a.m., I got back onto the boat from dive one at 9:12 a.m. actually and not back to Sunshine until noon.

Still, very sad that I didn’t get to talk to her indoors. Although, Hon, if you are reading this, my phone didn’t show ANY missed calls other than from Michael. Now we have talked on the phone already, so please check the number again.

There is the Castle party tonight that I have mentioned before, so I won’t be diving in the morning. In fact, a repetition of last night may occur. I was in my apartment about an hour ago and they already have the sound system going. IT IS LOUD. VERY LOUD. So ear plugs and sleeping tablet again tonight. At least I have learnt my lesson. No dives for me in the morning. Just my physics exam instead.

So Honey, give me a shout at 9 a.m. my time on Tuesday (9 p.m. on Monday for you)!!

Damn Castle party. Curse you.

On a positive note, I do actually feel more rested today.