Ok, new blog, new day....

Ok. It is minus 4˚ celsius, with a wind chill making it feel as though it is minus 10˚. Basically, it is fucking freezing. Now I know you hardy Canadian types are thinking it is positively balmy and that father winter has given you a reprieve from the harsh realities of living in the damn tundra. That is because you are delusional and suffering from cabin fever. You are fucked up. It is not warm, it is sub-arctic. Wake the hell up.


It is so damn cold that I have been back for less than four days and my lips are already desiccated and screaming for mercy. Blistex simply isn't enough in these harsh conditions, 2000 year old mummies have better looking lips than mine (no, not your mummy, Lee, Eygptian mummy's.....like from your favourite film, Bubba HoTep).


And less than four days ago, I was also donning a hoodie if the temperature dropped into the mid to low-20's. Dammit, I was wearing shorts and t-shirts, not longjohns and fleecies.


I know, I know, wha wha wha, I can hear you, but damn what a transition. Don't get me wrong, I am actually overjoyed to be home. I have my girls, I have my house, I have decent coffee, I have my XBox. But, even so, there is a strange feeling I simply cannot accurately pin down. I think it is actually a mild form of culture shock. If you have read my blog from the beginning, you'll know how immense of a culture shock it was to move to Koh Tao and know it was semi-permanent for three months. It took a while to settle into it. Well, despite the fact that this is my home, I think I am experiencing a similar sensation upon my return.


I almost feel like an outsider (outside of my family and home that is) and that things aren't properly permanent yet. This might explain why it has taken me three days to fully unpack, do my laundry and start to think rationally again (screw jetlag, I was over that bitch in under a day, that's right, mofo's, I rock).


Right now, it is just me and the girl too, the missus is across the country in Banff. Must be nice (tongue in cheek, says the boy from the 3 month hiatus). This is possibly adding to my discombobulation, I am sort of at a loose end.


Ah well. I've got my gear stowed, I have my laundry finished and I have introduced fishermen's pants to my humble abode in T.O. Oh, and I have gotten visa to recognize that I am back home and that some crazy country-hopping jackass hasn't stolen my card. Finally got my cell phone back on track and dealt with three or four different institutions on hour-long phone calls to get my life back on track (seriously, these phone centres must only hire muppets these days, it is like pulling teeth to get anything sorted out....but I am likely preaching to the choir here, I am sure you have all dealt with dickhead spotty-faced punks in some call centre in the States or some highly educated, but pissy snob working in an out-sourced phone centre in Mumbai).


And it is the Family Day weekend (yeah, long weekend for my return).....so start on the business plan next week!!

Hey, does anybody have a sample screenplay that they can lend me???