Ok, so yet again I forgot my freakin’ iPod and the noise in the Queen West Starbucks is at deafening levels. Considering that I like to totally annihilate my eardrums and hearing anyway by playing the music in my earphones at max volume, regardless of the song, the fact that I am finding this place “too loud” is a little disconcerting.
We got screaming babies, sickening doting mothers (Tee, I know you won’t be annoying like these ones who look like they couldn’t actually figure out how to tie their shoelaces if they had to…not that they have to, because their Jimmy Choo/Louboutin/Manolo Blahnik shoes don’t have laces, silly), a thousand grating ridiculous teenagers who aren’t at school because of that pathetic concept of Spring Break and who are talking about Disney movies, how “sick” they are and how much of a bitch Tiffany from grade 11 is, a jumped up prick who thinks he’s Joe Businessman in his cheap shirt, nasty trousers, leather jacket and bad tie trying to tell some skinny young woman a lecture (she’s obviously an employee/lower down on whatever pyramid) and a weird old guy who kind of smells. Fuck. Totally an iPod playing something that hurts its so loud kinda day. The only way to shut out the crap and let my brain focus on serious shit through the white noise and I left the bloody thing at home.
Talking iPod, I’ve currently been on a downloading spree….lots of cool new tunes to pump through my liquid brain. Although, I’ve got a couple of songs that, while I currently think they are cool, also totally make me a freak, possibly gay and certainly a little too middle-aged white guy trying to be hip. But hey, when you like a song, you like a song, so what am I supposed to do?
You see, what it comes down to is my workouts. “Huh?”, I can hear you mumble over the digital highway, “what the frak has that got to do with musical taste?” Well, when I hit the treadmill or start doing my workout, I’m always in front of the TV. Now, I find it hard to really concentrate on an in-depth show, when I run or workout, because I find both running and working out to be activities I still positively hate. Sure, I’m doing them quite a bit throughout the week, but at the same time, it doesn’t mean I have to like it. So when I run, I feel like my head is going to implode, that my chest will simply stop sucking in air and that my legs will give. Working out, it’s like my arms will collapse halfway through a lift and I’ll brain myself with a big weight (well, big in my eyes, puff-territory to a meathead though) or that the strain in my back and stomach will combine to make me squeal like a little girl. I hate it, but it’s good for me, so I suck it up. To distract myself from the pain, I put something on TV that occupies my attention, but which doesn’t require any actual strenuous thinking. I like to zone out (particularly running). So, on comes MuchMusic. Have you seen the shit they play recently? Music is mostly bad these days (yep…sounding old). But then there are a few songs that totally catch me and which, because they are played over and over and over and over, get stuck in my head.
Why else would I have a little T-Pain, MIA, T.I. Featuring Justin Timberlake and Flo-Rider on my iPod? Maybe I am just getting younger? Oh my god, I’m turning into Benjamin Button and I haven’t even seen the film or read the book?!?! This explains the fact that I will soon be able to fit into skinny jeans (the missus, Tee and Heather think I should get some…but is that a skinny comment or the fact they think I am gay?), that I listen to MuchMusic again and that I’m sitting in Starbucks for the free wifi everyday!
Oh, one last iPod rant. Why is it that every single time I open iTunes there is a new update that needs to be downloaded. I get that they constantly want to improve and upgrade their service, but seriously …
Oh yeah … and on a computer-related issue, what is with Twitter. Everyone is loving it. Again with the old man vibe, but come on, isn’t it the same thing as the Facebook update, except that that is all that it does??? I find Facebook to be a love-hate thing for me anyway, so why on earth would I want a tool that lets me update the general friend-public about my every moment and vice-versa? “Chris is in the car”, “Chris is at the park”, “Chris just saw a dead squirrel”, “Chris just gave himself his weekly enema”….Jesus. I already drive you lot batty with overly long blog postings, but to wind you all up throughout the day with frequent updates, well, we’re talking postal territory. And by “postal territory” for you less-knowledgeable types, I mean it’d be enough to drive you so crazy you walk into your work place with a sawn-off shotgun and start blasting.
And can you imagine if someone like Trish got her hands on this??? (Oh, “Hi” Trish, sorry I haven’t been emailing loads in the last couple of weeks, I’ve been some kind of crazy busy). For the love of god, we need to start a campaign to end this ridiculous application.
Outside of rant-land, we’ve had a remarkable spell of nicer weather here in Toronto. Not enough that it reminds me of tropical climes, but it’s been a welcome change. Well, sort of. It meant that we had a good game of football on Saturday and walking the pup yesterday was delightful in my spring coat, but it has also meant that I have had to collect a bunch of dissolved dog poop out of the now de-thawed back yard, that everybody and their dog/grandma/mewling sprog was in the off-leash area of the park yesterday and that there are more jack-ass teenage thugs strolling around.
It’s also Fashion Week here in Toronto. I’d love to enthuse about it and get you all excited that such a fabulous event in yet again raising it’s annual head here in the City of Great Things, but I have no friggin’ clue what it actually is. Someone wrote that it is like the Toronto Film Festival, but, with all due respect, that’s bollocks. The Film Festival is something that ANYONE can get into, because it’s movies!! The world of “fashion” is a weird display of circus-like freaks that I have never understood. I don’t think I am alone in this either, so I am guessing there is a large percentage of the population that is also wondering what the hell goes on at Fashion Week and why so many people get so excited about it. I am also imagining that it probably costs the City and the Province money for this gig, which means its money out of yours and my pocket to host it (well more your pocket than mine, because I don’t currently have an income).
On the business front, Peter is back and settled in and we’re going to get things rolling within the next few weeks (well that is the plan anyway), so keep your ears open and your eyes peeled (God that sounds gross doesn’t it? Why would you peel your eyes? Sounds excruciating).
It may not happen this week if Peter is still nursing a hangover from Saturday night. We managed a 4:30 a.m. finish to the evening. It was supposed to be a pub crawl down Ossington from Heather’s house, except we never made it out of her door. Peter introduced us to a new drinking game. The fundamental concept is you have to guess if your face down card is higher or lower than the face up “table card”. If you are wrong, you down one of the glasses full of various alcohol-filled concoctions on the table. It gets messy fast, but, to be fair, is also a shit-load of fun. We’ll be giving that one another go, I’m sure.
And to finish the blog for today, big shout out to my brother and Lynsey (his fiancée), because they set a date for their wedding….looks like I’ll be in Scotland in September….
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment